If Home Isn’t So Sweet, It’s Time for a Divorce Housewarming Party
When you divorce, that feeling of your home as a sanctuary can go quickly out the window. If you stay in the home you shared with your ex, you have that ‘always something there to remind me’ problem. If you move into a temporary place, it can feel chaotic and unsettled. If you’re moving into an entirely new place, you’ve got to make it your own. No matter what your home situation is, you can make it more welcome (and ease the transition) by throwing yourself a Divorce Housewarming Party.
A Divorce Housewarming Party is like the non-divorce kind but with some added features. And it’s more about welcoming YOU to your new home and life with the help of family and friends. It’s also a celebration of how far you’ve come and where you’re going.
Prepping Your Home to Be Yours
Start by preparing your house for its fantastic inhabitant(s): you and your family! If you’re staying in the same house, you can redecorate or rearrange parts of the house, get rid of ex reminders, and make your space beautiful and so it feels good to you. If it’s a more temporary place, make it as comforting and familiar as possible – even putting up some pictures and fresh flowers can help. If you’re moving into a new space, arrange your space differently, bring in only what makes you feel good, and do simple things like add some color, fragrance, and beauty.
You don’t have to spend a lot; rearranging the furniture and moving accessories and art around can make a big difference. If there are reminders of your ex that you’re unsure you want to dump completely, hide them away for awhile and check in after several months (or years) to see how you feel. The main point is to get rid of things that make you feel guilty or ‘less than’ and feature things that make you feel good. Also, start using those good things you have – no more saving them for special occasions. NOW is the special occasion!
Party Planning Is About Creating Your Sacred Space
Once you have the house ready, it’s time to party plan. Invite your nearest and dearest, the people that really make you feel good and that want only the best for you. For the party itself, decide whether you want to serve food and drink, go potluck, or keep it simple with tea or something else.
Now it’s time to get creative! Spend some time reflecting on how you want to be welcomed into your new space and what would make it feel like it’s your own. You’ll use this both to set your own personal intention and to plan your party. This is entirely up to you, but here are some suggestions to get you started.
There’s a reason special events start with some kind of ceremony: it dedicates the event and signals that something special is happening. Since you’re creating a sanctuary for yourself and your family, why not give it some special attention? To kick off your Divorce Housewarming Party, you can read a poem, play some music, or say a prayer. Or you can just share a few words to set the context for what you want to bring into your home and what this gathering means to you. You may want to clear the energy by lighting a candle, using essential oils, or burning sage.
Intentions and Dedication
Next, think about what you’d like your friends to prepare. Maybe they can each share their intentions for what they wish for you to have and to feel in your new home. They could read a poem or prayer. They could share a simple piece of art they’ve created for your home. You could create something together, like a box full of good wishes, a tree with intentions hanging on the branches, or writing beautiful quotes on a poster board to display in your home. Or you can ask each person to bring something unique to share. Afterwards, remember your Divorce Housewarming Party by putting a framed photo of it somewhere prominent. It’ll be a welcome reminder, especially on the tough days.
All of this infuses you and your new home with amazing, super-powered energy – it will literally light the place up! You’ll also have the added benefit of having things to look at and remember in those moments when you’re feeling down. At my friend’s party, we all decorated hearts with our wishes for her. She put them into a coffee table book that she could look at any time she needed a boost. Your posse will always be with you: supporting you and sending love your way.
Once each person has contributed, thank each of them publicly and acknowledge how they’ve helped you through your divorce process. Gratitude is the best gift you can give another person. It feels great on both the receiving and the giving side, so that’s a double bonus.
Now that you’ve done all that, it’s time to party! Enjoy with a meal, dancing, tea, meditation, cartwheels, group coloring, or anything else that’s fun. Be sure to soak up time with all these great people – and make sure to hydrate. Hydration is always important.